Crystal the Artist

If you want to know the truth: I'm pretty sure I'll fail, over and over again. But I'm going to keep on trying, Every single time. My dream isn't to open a studio, or buy a house, or make an incredible amount of money. It isn't even to travel,  or see the world. My dream is to be there for my children, and to provide everything I know they deserve from me. My dream is to see them flourish. I'd give anything to make that happen. I'd devote my whole life to never giving up, Just to give them a better chance. If you want to know the truth: I have more insecurities than confidence. I think more of you than I'll ever think of me.  I have days that I talk myself into just taking that next best step. Sometimes it's a shower, or a drink of water, or healthy food. Sometimes it's a phone call, or starting a marketing campaign. Most days it's a nap, Then getting back up to continue the day, One more step at a time. If you want to know the truth: I don&#

Late night musings: I am getting ready to launch a fresh blog and there is so much swirling through my head as I contemplate life and the direction the last couple months have taken me. On the tail end of a second wind of online dating, I decided to take a pause from getting to know and investing in other people. There were a lot of factors that propelled me in that direction. There was the continuation of the threats that Covid-19 pose, a messy ending to a new friendship, some rejection, a lot of ugly but needed boundary setting, and an emerging feeling of needing to prove myself over and over again. Top that off with other personal issues involving my kids, and I’m sure no one would fault me for wanting to write off men entirely. But there was also something else. A tiny little seedling of life that was changing from sprout to flower and to the promise of undiscovered fruit. So many of the last years of my life have been spent living in survival and in the long process of healing fro